2.5 out of 10
Released: 28th October 2011
Director: Arjun Rose
Cast: Robert Sheehan, Ashley Walters, Jennie Jacques, Jason Maza, Femi Oyeniran, Jacob Anderson, Jack Doolan, Shanika Warren-Markland, Andrew Ellis, Emma Rigby, Patrick Baladi with Reggie Yates and Tulisa Contosavlos
Writer: Arjun Rose
Trailer: DEMONS NEVER DIE
For haters of the current crop of inner city dramas built for our disenfranchised youth, here come s a dream come true. A slasher flick! So essentially imagine Kidulthood with a slasher on the loose eliminating your priss, your chav racist, your street thug, all diced and sliced for your delight. Sadly this isn’t even a quarter of the fun it should have been. The trouble with this is casting established faces of the said dramas like Jason Maza (TRUTH OR DARE), Ashley Walters (SKET) and Femi Oyeniran (ANUVAHOOD) amongst others. It’s played extremely straight. It reminds me of a very boring Brit-pic from the late 90s called Long Time Dead. There is only some invention in the set-up as unconvincing as it is. Eight or nine college kids have set up a “Suicide Club”. They all meet together online and in person to discuss how they are all going to end their lives within a few weeks. The trouble is someone is picking them off before they get a chance to do it themselves. Lots of tepid red herrings raise their heads but this is one slow horror movie. I don’t think any of the victims so much as break into a run at anytime. Once the characters realise that they want to live they don’t actually act like they need to. The acting is OK, standout is Jennie Jacques (SHANK), the closest we have here to a scream queen, she alone convinces. Jason Maza‘s unhinged homocidal racist (is he the slasher?) is over the top in a utterly half-baked, badly written role as the club’s most committed member. Ashley Walters and Reggie Yates (voice of RASTAMOUSE) are the sleepiest feds ever, even when they are performing. An utter waste of time, you’ve been here fifty times before in equally lacklustre American films. It’s competently shot, the score is made up of dope grime and dub step tunes but it doesn’t make the film all that creepy. You won’t be scared and the main positive point I can think of is that once the slasher’s identity is revealed, they don’t have a massive expositional monologue. The motives aren’t even paid lip service and remain in the shadows.
Demons Never Die is utterly pedestrian. So dull even the usually good actors are on auto-pilot. It’s a shame because originality isn’t always needed in horror. Just some idea of how to create a sense of fear and forboding would have been good. Think Kidulthood (which was good) meets Scream (which is classic) and fillet out all the wit and flare and you have Demons Never Die….
Oh yeah, on a side note – above the title star Tulisa (BIG FAT GYPSY GANGSTER) from grime stars N-Dubz is in the first five minutes. Another piece of advertising subterfuge. She puts in the only other good performance in the movie in the Drew Barrymore – Scream style-equivalent role. Isn’t a leading role by Ashley Walters a big enough draw without selling this movie on a short cameo? Maybe they knew this flick needed all the help it could get at the cinema.
2.5 out of 10 – Should be called Slashers Shouldn’t Be This Sleepy. A wasted opportunity. But nowhere near as bad as 90s Brit-Slasher Long Time Dead.
**READ JOE PESCI II’s funny review below!!** aka Reasons to avoid.>>!
WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT PERSON IN BEFORE?
- Robert Sheehan: Jet Trash, The Messanger (2015), The Mortal Instruments, Misfits (TV), The Season Of The Witch, Killing Bono, Cherrybomb
- Ashley Walters: Erasure, Take Down, Montana, All Stars, St. George’s Day,AnuvaHood, Demons Never Die, Sket, Top Boy (TV), Speed Racer, Get Rich Or Die Tryin’, Life & Lyrics, Goal, Stormchaser – Alex Rider, Bullet Boy
- Jason Maza: Sexy Bizniss, Angel (2015), #Legacy, The Hooligan Factory, Traveller, Little Deaths, Get Lucky, Welcome To The Punch, The Knot, Truth or Dare, The Man Inside (2012), Outside Bet, Anuvahood, Fit, KickOff, Ten Dead Men, Hush Your Mouth, Fish Tank, Shifty, Rise Of The Footsoldier
- Jennie Jacques: Vikings (TV), Truth Or Dare, 7Lives, Cherry Tree Lane, Shank
- Reggie Yates: Rastamouse (voice – TV), The Voice UK (TV), Top Of The Pops (TV), Dr Who (TV), T In The Park (TV), Radio 1’s Big Weekend (TV), Grange Hill (TV)
- Femi Oyeniran: Taking Stock, The Intent, It’s a Lot, Anuvahood, Adulthood, Kidulthood
- Jacob Anderson: Game of Thrones (TV), Broadchurch (TV), Comedown, Offender, Chatroom, 4-3-2-1, Adulthood
- Jack Doolan: Bachelor Games, It’s a Lot, Green Street 3, The Facility, May I Kill U?, Cockneys Vs. Zombies, Cemetery Junction
- Shanika Warren-Markland: Gone Too Far, Victim, 4-3-2-1, Adulthood
- Andrew Ellis: Invasion of the Not Quite Dead, Dough, This Is England ’90 (TV), The Knife That Killed Me, Borrowed Time, This Is England 88 (TV), This Is England 86 (TV), This Is England
- Emma Rigby: A Hundred Streets, Endless Love, Plastic, Hollyoaks (TV)
- Patrick Baladi: Stella (TV), Rush, No Fixed Abode, Now Is Good, Streetdance 3D, The International, The Office (TV)
- Tulisa Contostavlos: X-Factor (TV), Being N-Dubz, Big Fat Gypsy Gangster