2 out of 10

Release Date: 31st March 2014 (DVD Premiere)

Director: Kieran Parker

Cast: Bryan Larkin, Michael McKell, Ivan Kamara, Velibor Topic, Douglas Russell, Ben Lambert, Vivien Taylor and Johnny Meres

Writer: Kieran Parker & Rae Brunton

Trailer: OUTPOST 3

Unknown-10Now this is disappointing. The original Outpost was a DOA non-thriller which trudged through the ‘ten little soldiers’ formula in which a small bunch of mercenaries are sent to retrieve a mysterious device that creates undead super soldiers from a former-Nazi Bunker. Outpost 2 was a vast improvement that opened the premise up to excellent effect and featured competent name actors playing Nazi hunters. Whilst the makers are scratching their heads wondering how to continue their series on a positive note they’ve rushed out this very boring prequel that shows us how the bunker came to be – who ran it and what would happen to anybody who came into contact with it.

A small squad of Russian soldiers are our heroes on this occasion. They are led by a plank played by another plank (BRYAN LARKIN) sporting a dodgy Russian accent into a forest to follow a mysterious road. After they ambush a Nazi convoy the survivors of the attack get taken prisoner and thrown in to a cell deep inside the bunker. The Kommandment (MICHAEL MCKELL – FREIGHT) is a brutal schwein who is project managing the said scheme to develop an everlasting unkillable soldier. From this point on it turns into an indistinguishable remake of War of the Dead with its endless series of gun fights, near misses punch ups, and gory endings for its dimly lit procession of Frankenstein-lite soldiers.

The only curiosity is the inclusion of Johnny Meres (OUTPOST 2) as General Gotz. A character from the first two films who I’d have thought would have had his back story investigated in a prequel such as this? He’s an intriguing character full of mystery but it would seem the makers either don’t care or are saving his story for a future sequel. In part 3, he pops up as one of the prisoners, pulls a funny face and disappears into the murk again. A waste of time.

This second sequel squanders all the good will generated by it’s hard working predecessor.  That it shares the same writer is even more of a puzzle. The lack of momentum and plot is a real kick in the balls as I felt I’d been cheated into watching this. If part 2 was a lemon would I have watched this? We’ll never know. But sadly there’s nothing to report. This is pointless, unthoughtful and has zero to say about the experiments that go on in the bunker. There’s literally no sign of the vril generator or any of the intrigue of part 2’s story.

2 out of 10 – Deadly boring sequel that only offers competent fight scenes in dimly lit rooms again and again. Evidence of a squandered good idea that’s been painted into to a corner.

 Review below by Matt Usher



One thought on “OUTPOST 3

  1. OUTPOST 3: RISE OF THE SPETSNAZ – review by Matt Mother ‘r’Usher

    You know a film’s failed when you’re cheering for the Nazis. Yet somehow this happens in OUTPOST 3, and my cheering was in no way ironic (please note that I do not support the Nazis in any way – I hate those guys. Except in OUTPOST 3). Our hero in this film is so repulsive, thick and boring that you have no option but to hope that the Nazis end his tedious one-man blitzkrieg (they don’t – he survives and turns into a different actor in a pointless framing flashback device thing, unable to speak in anything other than melancholy epigrams, homespun homilies and clichés).

    But who is this meat-headed Nazi-killing machine and why on Earth would a mild-mannered film critic side against him so bitterly? He’s a Russian soldier / spy played by Bryan Larkin (with all the charisma and versatility of a brick) and he’s on a mission to steal the Nazis’ latest wheeze (if you’ve seen the other OUTPOSTs you’ll know all about it already; if not: why are you reading this?) (They’re trying to come up with ways of reanimating the dead and turning them into Killer Nazi Zombies.).

    So, yes, OUTPOST 3 is a prequel, set in World War 2. Foolishly, what with the number 3 being bandied about (rendered as III to make it more noble-looking), I assumed that it was a sequel. This misapprehension was strengthened by the film opening with a sequence in which we see a Nazi-Soviet skirmish filmed almost in black and white. Never has so much green looked so grey. The same goes for all the red that was supposedly on view. Ah, I thought, a prologue to get us started. But then the skirmish was over, and we stayed in this near-monochrome world. The whole film turned out to be the prologue. The film is so drained of colour it’s like they got the stock back from the developers and only then realised they hadn’t switched the colour up. They don’t even use any sudden splashes of red (for blood) or blue (for sky) to offer stark contrast. The blood is grey. And there’s lots of it.

    So what happens in this prologue / prequel? Well, the Soviets have got hold of some plans (like the STAR WARS Rebel Alliance but without Princess Leia) but are mostly killed by Nazis in an ambush (a Soviet ambush – they’re a bit rubbish these Russians), and the few survivors are taken down into the OUTPOST (i.e. – a hole in the ground) (first rule of movies: never go down a hole in the ground). There we find the Nazis are having a whale of a time doing their nasty / weird zombie-generating experiments. Despite the OUTPOST being filled with crack stormtroopers, crazy scientists and all manner of scientific abominations (including zombies standing around having competitions to see who can say ‘arg’ best), our ‘hero’ soon finishes them all off.

    You can see the problem I’m sure. From the previous films, we already know what the demonic scientists were getting up to down the hole. We see it all in action in this film, but what we don’t see is the origins. At no point is there a scene set in a Nazi High Command Planning Meeting where someone has a bright idea and says ‘why don’t we dig a hole and bring back zombies!’ So, as origins stories go its notable only for not actually showing us the origins of the project – it’s already up and running, and the Russians have already worked out that it’s something that needs to be stopped. In fact, what we actually see isn’t THE RISE but THE TOTAL DESTRUCTION OF THE SPETSNAZ.

    For those fans of previous OUTPOST films (who really should find other interests) there is surprisingly little to get excited about. A significant character from the other films turns up but only yawns. You’ll probably respond in kind. And the big oojafit thingy from the other films (that big generator which uses Julian Wadham as a battery) doesn’t turn up at all. And if I’ve understood things properly, in this OUTPOST it’s possible to age after death.

    Meanwhile, OUTPOST 3 fails in its own right. It goes on forever and is forever grey. Great gobbets of grey gore are strewn about with gay abandon, the film-makers desperately hoping that we’ll mistake the gruesomeness for tough storytelling. The central character has two modes of speech: swearing and spouting poetic propaganda. We’re meant to admire his toughness and his resourcefulness: he uses a tooth to jam a door, he can bend strong metal, he kills more Nazis than died on the Eastern Front. And then there’s the American. I seem to remember being quite harsh about the American in the original OUTPOST. Here they introduce an American who is effectively the same character, but our hero simply uses him as bait, and lets him die after learning some important information. I think we’re meant to be impressed by his ruthlessness. But seeing as the information he gleaned was: the ventilation shafts lead to the surface (don’t they always?), it all seems a bit of a waste of time, energy and human resources. The film eagerly whittles its cast down to size, but it is impossible to have any interest as none of these characters is on screen long enough to make an impression; they are merely introduced in order to get smothered in grey blood.

    If you are desperate to discover the origins story of the Nazi Zombie Programme, you need to look elsewhere. This is just a drab retread of the first film (but with fewer zombies and more humans). If you just want a nice simple Nazi Zombie Killer movie, the search goes on. This is effectively this franchise’s PHANTOM MENACE, concentrating on things the viewer isn’t interested in and failing to do justice to its own story by using the wrong formula. I’m beginning to think that Killer Nazi Zombie films are a bad idea.

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