2 out of 10
RELEASE DATE: 12th January 2015 (DVD Premiere)
Director: Paul Tanter (Dystopia (TV) / No Easy Days (TV) / The Disappearance of Lenka Wood / Meet The Firm – White Collar Hooligan 3 / Shame The Devil / The Hooligan Wars / He Who Dares / Essex Boys Retribution / White Collar Hooligan 2 / Fall of the Essex Boys / Rise of the White Collar Hooligan / Jack Falls)
Cast: Tom Benedict Knight, Simon Phillips, Russell Kilmister, Merissa Porter, Lucy Bayler, Warwick Evans, Christina Bellavia and Ryan Winsley
Writer: Jonathan Westwood and Paul Tanter
Trailer: HE WHO DARES 2
TO BE PROOFREAD: He Who Dares 2 is only marginally less shit than the first one. There seems to be a bit more thought put into the plot this time around and its far less set-bound. The ever-expanding actor-prodcuer Simon Phillips (DANGEROUS MIND OF A HOOLIGAN) takes centre-stage as the villainous Holt (who I thought had died at the end of part one). In part two he wants to hold the Prime Minister of Great Britain (RUSSELL KILMISTER) hostage at number 10. He literally walks through the front door with a small army of stripper killing (don’t ask) mercenaries to wreak havoc. Only one man can stop him. Guess who?
Well it would’ve been more interesting if an Ed Balls or Michael Gove-type had turned all John McClane, but sadly it’s our non-hero Chris Lowe (TOM BENEDICT KNIGHT – HE WHO DARES), the renegade SAS major who rescued the Prime Minister’s daughter (CHRISTINA BELLAVIA) from Holt in part one. He’s in the process of being dishonourably discharged for leading said mission at number 10 at the very same time that Holt is laying siege to it. Bad timing cockfags! (as per Team America!)
With this being another Paul Tanter directed non-film you should know the drill by now. This is a supermarker brand localisation of Olympus Has Fallen or White House Down – better yet Die Hard Without a Clue. We have a chimpanzee for a leading man (Tom Benedict Knight really looks like a PG Tips chimp on steroids), who at least gets a look in this time when faced with Simon Phillips’ most bizarre creation yet – in a nutshell we get a plank versus a ham having badly choreographed fights on the carpet at number 10. So why’s it better than the first one? He Who Dares 2 seems to have been plotted firmly as opposed to being a string of repetitive skirmishes punctuated by Holt over-gesticulating with a water pistol. At times, I also was convinced that we were at Number 10, although there’s a scene on the roof that seems to have relocated the Prime Minister’s lair to Surbiton. Not all of the acting was dreadful, so a diluted percentage of this made it a bit more palatable. The makers also decided to distinguish two of Holt’s goons this time around too – now we get a hot James Bond-lite villainess (MERISSA PORTER) and a football hooligan type that says ‘c*nt’ a lot played by Ryan Winsley (ESSEX BOYS RETRIBUTION). I think Porter’s kung-fu chopping bad girl is the sister of The Honeytrap from part one but it’s not clear. The fight choreography and action scenes are some of the worst seen in a Tanter/Phillips production however so they lose points by presenting these to the viewing public.
It has some moments of humour. The word ‘pleb’ is bandied about to useful effect and gets one or two members of the cast killed alongside some of the overacting by Simon Phillips (along with very lame attempts at intended humour) which raise a titter. Sadly though its business as usual as yet another slack wannabe drops off the end of Tanter/Phillips production line. It’s lazy-ish and yet another exercise in confirming Simon Phillips lack of acting range. There’s also more of that Tony Scott-style reportage / St. Vitus’ dance cinematography again. That got old and worn out around the time of the first Bourne movie… These dudes need to get out more.
2 out of 10 – Filmmaking for plebs by plebs. Look out or rather avoid the TV series sequel to this called No Easy Days. Could I recommend casting Ed Balls and Michael Gove for the Tango & Cash reboot please!
Second review below by Joe Pesci II aka Matt Usher – where he calls Simon Phillips the Chuckle Brother of Crime.
WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?
- Tom Benedict Knight: Brash Young Turks, Underbelly,The Disappearance of Lenka Wood, The Call-Up, He Who Dares, White Collar Hooligan 2
- Simon Phillips: The Last Scout, The Disappearance of Lenka Wood, Dystopia (TV), No Easy Days (TV), Meet The Firm – White Collar Hooligan 3, Shame The Devil, The Hooligan Wars, Dangerous Mind of a Hooligan, He Who Dares, Essex Boys Retribution, White Collar Hooligan 2, Fall of the Essex Boys, UFO (2013), The Rise and Fall Of a White Collar Hooligan, Strippers Vs. Werewolves, Airborne, The Reverend (2012), Ghosted, How to Stop Being a Loser, Kill Keith, Jack Says, Jack Said, Jack Falls, The Last Seven, Just For The Record, Stagger, Risen, Cut
- Christina Bellavia: He Who Dares
- Ryan Winsley: Undercover Hooligan, ABCs of Death 2, Essex Boys – Retribution, Piggy, Hush Your Mouth