1.5 out of 10
Release Date: 12th September 2016 (DVD Premiere)
Director: Andrew Jones (The Toymaker / The Exorcism of Anna Ecklund / Robert / Conjuring The Dead / The Haunting At The Rectory / Poltergeist Activity / The Last House on Cemetery Lane / Theatre of Fear / Amityville Asylum)
Writer: Andrew Jones
Cast: Tiffany Ceri, Jason Homewood, Steven Dolton, Nigel Barber, Chris Bell, Clare Gollop, Christopher Hale, Richard Burman with Lee Bane and Suzie Frances Garton
Trailer: ROBERT 2
By rights the first film about the cursed killer doll Robert the Doll should have been ridiculous. But it contained good performances and some effective chills. This sequel should be filed along side Nightmare On Elm Street 2 in the shit sequel box.
Robert the Doll gets stolen out of a police evidence box and sold to an evil American museum owner keen on making lots of money from people wanting to get a glimpse of the legend. Once Robert is installed he goes on a killing rampage pinning the blame on a glamorous Mrs Mop, Tiffany Ceri (THEATRE OF FEAR). Different cops get on the case only to be saddled with straight out the cliched cop box dialogue. Steven Dolton (THE HAUNTING OF ANNIE DYER) and Chris Bell (RISE OF THE FOOTSOLDIER 3) as the hapless cops are wasted and its sad to see them strait jacketed by director / writer Andrew Jones’ crappiest script yet. Tiffany Ceri, who impressed in previous Jones’ films is given a real plank of an actor to work opposite – step forward first timer Jason Homewood who is more wooden than the doll. What the film lacks is Lee Bane (THE TOYMAKER) – who was killed in the first film. He pops up here in a new role at the end, in the films only strange / good scene. By showing us a film without him, actually shows us how much he improves the material he’s been given in past Jones’ movies. An official spin-off called The Toymaker is next off the conveyor belt, so look out as Robert might be back.
Back to this film which is set in the worst excuse for a museum I’ve ever seen. Does it really exist as the exhibits seemed to consist of a few dummies and a fake shop? At least the director turns the lights off in this movie and attempts to create an atmosphere, but unfortunately the film is a massive blunt instrument. There’s no build up, as Robert just hops out of his display case and kills everyone without any preamble. In the first film there was a lot of smoke & mirrors, we never saw the doll move for the longest time. Here he’s a fully animated psycho. So creepiness adds up to zero and it’s about as scary as Chuggington. Oh yeah, the film score is very bad too. Very bad.
We’ve caught Andrew Jones’ and co. on a serious ‘off’ day, so let’s see if they can make a comeback. It needs to happen, hopefully with Lee Bane back in the lead role to give some gravity to proceedings.
1.5 out of 10 – Very poor, lazy and pointless sequel that just seems like a set up for The Toymaker.
Another review below by Matt Usher
WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?
- Tiffany Ceri: Angel of Decay, The Exorcism of Anna Ecklund, Theatre of Fear
- Steven Dolton: The Haunting of Annie Dyer, Killer/Saurus, Devil’s Tower, Zombie Undead
- Chris Bell: Haunted 5, Haunted 4, Knights of the Damned, Bonded By Blood 2, Haunted 3, Haunted 2, Rise of the Footsoldier 3, Bonded By Blood 2, Simon, I Am Hooligan, Essex Boys – Law of Survival, Hooligans At War
- Christopher Hale: Crowhurst
- Richard Burman: Silent Night Bloody Night (2013), Night of the Living Dead -Resurrection
- Lee Bane: Indifferent, The Toymaker, Kamikaze, Kerb Crawlers, The Exorcism of Anna Ecklund, Robert, Conjuring The Dead, The Haunting At The Rectory, Poltergeist Activity, The Last House on Cemetery Lane, Theatre of Fear, Amityville Asylum, Night of the Living Dead – Resurrection, Silent Night Bloody Night (2013)
- Suzie Frances Garton: Robert, The Haunting At The Rectory