2 out of 10
Release Date: 17th October 2016 (DVD Premiere)
Director: Terry Lee Coker (Essex Vendetta)
Cast: Michael McKell, Sidney Livingstone, Robert Putt, James Osborne, Sidney Kean with Tony (AG) Armstrong and Ian Burfield
Writer: Terry Lee Coker, Michael McKell and Ian Burfield
Trailer: HATTON GARDEN – THE HEIST
Based on his short track record so far, Terry Lee Coker the film director is in the same league as Steve M Smith in the talent stakes. As a scriptwriter, he’s slightly better as he wrote but never directed Hooligan Legacy, which remains one of the best films with the word ‘Hooligan’ in the title. However, based on his script duties here and for the previous Essex Vendetta, something, somewhere doesn’t add up. I won’t spell it out.
To the film, Hatton Garden, Coker’s second film as director and his second collaboration with part-time crooner Michael McKell (DOCTORS) and Ian Burfield (THE INTERNATIONAL), two reasonably decent actors. Moving on from the tedious Essex Boys murders, here’s the first in a series of repetitive films about the Hatton Garden Diamond Heist. Perpertrated by four OAPS and a younger mystery man called Basil, judging by this film the aftermath was far more interesting then the set-up, my god this film is boring and dare I say it pointless.
The leading actors who portray the four robbers (there were six in real life) make the cast of the Last of the Summer Wine look like the cast of Avenger’s Assemble. It’s like watching an episode of Eastenders where the cast filled their shoes with concrete and took a whopping does of ketamine. The director looks like he left the catering staff to do his job and it’s just a shambles but a boring one at the that. Short lines of dialogue are delviered slowly and the gaps between lines of dialogue are gargantuan, and it’s not Pinter. It’s zed-grade drama, thin tension and a completely rush job. The only thing this film succeeds in doing is making Essex Vendetta seem interesting. And that is a proper achievement.
As the four lags are found, they proceed to run rings and some very stupid cops in some of the worst police interrogation scenes you’ll ever see. This even gives Steve Dolton’s cop in the Haunting of Annie Dyer a run for its money. And these scenes are the best at highlighting what a lazy attempt to cash in on a famous crime this is.
2 out of 10 – Slapdash and boring, this could be the worst heist you’ll ever see. Shat on Gardens more like.
Another review by Matt Usher below
WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?
- Michael McKell: Winter Ridge, Essex Vendetta, Death (2014), Outpost 3, Who Needs Enemies?, Doctors (TV), Emmerdale (TV), Freight, Essex Boys
- Sidney Livingstone: Essex Vendetta
- Tony (AG) Armstrong: Essex Vendetta
- Ian Burfield: Winter Ridge, Dark Channel, Essex Vendetta, The Selfish Giant, Mercenaries, The International, Eastenders (TV), Circus, London’s Burning (TV), The Krays