TIN

3 out of 10

Release date: 17th April 2015

Director: Bill Scott

Cast: Jenny Agutter, Helen Bendell, Ben Dyson, Dean Nolan, Stuart Boother, Jason Squibb, Benjamin Luxon and Dudley Sutton

Writer: Bill Scott

Trailer: TIN

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An unusual import from Kernow this ‘ere film Tin. Whilst it’s not the am-dram shocker you might expect to see like Draw On Sweet Night, this is a flawed but noble effort to deliver something a bit different. Definitely a film about Cornwall, for Cornish folk, made in the main by a Cornish theatre group, Tin tells the story of the tin mine Wheal Fortune and what happens when the owners try to swindle the bank out of some money. The scam backfires when the shares are unwittingly bought back by a meddling do-gooder.  Elsewhere, a young girl Nell (HELEN BLENDELL) decides whether her heart belongs with a local clergy man (JASON SQUIBB – POLDARK) or a travelling actor (STUART BOOTHER – DEAD OF THE NITE). Her master is the captain of the mine, (BEN DYSON – BROWN WILLY) a deluded god-fearing man who was privvy to the swindle and fears that he may burn in hell. Many of the scenes scuttle past without muster, and some are long musical pieces that demonstrate how well the cast can sing a Cornish choral-ditty. However, few of the scenes catch fire, and the cast are vastly uneven. Some are seasoned pros like Dudley Sutton (ORLANDO) or Jenny Agutter (WALKABOUT) where as others are first-timers and stumble at some of the easiest hurdles.

The cost-cutting device of using green-screen for some of the scenes, with projections of old photographs of the old streets and mines of the 19th century. Some of the scenes are set on real cliffs and beaches though, or on physical indoor sets. An outdoor privee features in many scenes… hmmm.

Cluttered, muddled yet fairly unique, it’s a tough ask to get anybody who lives outside of Cornwall to sit and watch this. Whilst it’s not flat or boring, it’s just messy and incoherent to impediment of a committed cast that could have made this interesting subject fly. Instead it’s permanently grounded and fairly confusing.

3 out of 10 – A bold attempt to shine a light on a forgotten period in Cornish history is marred by fussy production values, incoherent plot and erratic performances.

WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?

  • Jenny Agutter: Call The Midwife (TV), Queen of the Desert, Captain America 2, Avenger’s Assemble, Outside Bet, Burke and Hare, Glorious 39, Blue Juice,  Child’s Play 2, Dark Man,  An American Werewolf In London, Equus, The Eagle Has Landed, Logan’s Run (1976),  Walkabout, The Railway Children
  • Ben Dyson: Brown Willy
  • Dean Nolan: Weekend Retreat
  • Stuart Boother: Dead of the Nite
  • Jason Squibb: Poldark (TV)
  • Dudley Sutton: Fall of An Empire, Weekend Retreat, Cockneys Vs. ZombiesOutside Bet, The Shouting Men, Lovejoy (TV), Dean Spanley, Eastenders (TV), The Football Factory, The Tichborne Claimant, Incognito (1997), Orlando, Edward II, The Rainbow, The Devils, The London Connection, The Pink Panther Strikes Again, The Leather Boys

T2 – TRAINSPOTTING

4.5 out of 10

REVIEW COMING SOON

Release date: 27th January 2017

Director: Danny Boyle (Steve Jobs / Babylon (TV) (2014) / Trance127 Hours / Slumdog Millionnaire / Sunshine (2007) / Millions / 28 Days Later / The Beach / A Life Less Ordinary / Trainspotting / Shallow Grave)

Cast: Ewan McGregor, Ewen Bremner, Jonny Lee Miller, Kelly MacDonald and Robert Carlyle with Anjela Nedyalkova, Irvine Welsh, Pauline Turner, Scot Greenan, Gordon Kennedy with James Cosmo and Shirley Henderson

Writer: John Hodge / Irvine Welsh

Trailer: T2 – TRAINSPOTTING

WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?

  • Ewan McGregor: Beauty and the Beast (2017), American Pastoral (dir), Our Kind of Traitor, Jane Got a Gun, Fargo (TV), Miles Ahead, Son of a Gun, Mortdecai, August-Osage County, Jack The Giant Slayer, The Impossible, Salmon Fishing In The Yemen, Haywire, Beginners, Perfect Sense, Jackboots On Whitehall (voice), Nanny McPhee, The Ghost, Amelia, The Men Who Stare At Goats, Angels & Demons, I Love You Phillip Morris, Incediary, Cassandra’s Dream, Miss Potter, Scenes Of a Sexual Nature, Alex Rider -Storm Breaker, Stay, The Island (2005), Star Wars III – The Revenge Of The Sith, Valiant (voice), Robots (voice), Big Fish, Down With Love, Star Wars II – Attack Of The Clones, Black Hawk Down, Moulin Rouge, Nora, Eye Of The Beholder, Rogue Trader, Star Wars – The Phantom Menace, Little Voice, Velvet Goldmine, A Life Less Ordinary, Serpent’s Kiss, Nightwatch, Brassed Off, Emma (1996), The Pillow Book, Trainspotting, Blue Juice, Shallow Grave, Being Human, Lipstick On Your Collar (TV)
  • Ewen Bremner: Wonder Woman, Banished (TV), Get Santa, Exodus – Gods and Kings, Snowpiercer,  Jack The Giant Slayer, Great Expectations (2012), Perfect Sense, Faintheart, Fool’s Gold, Hallam Foe, Death At a Funeral (2007), Match Point, Alien Vs. Predator, Around The World In 80 Days, Welcome To The Jungle, 16 Years Of Alcohol, Black Hawk Down, Pearl Harbour, Snatch, Julien Donkey Boy, The Acid House, Mojo, Trainspotting, Judge Dredd (1995), Naked, As You Like It (1992)
  • Jonny Lee Miller: Elementary (TV),  Byzantium, Dark Shadows, The Flying Scotsman, Aeon Flux, Melinda and Melinda, Mindhunters, Dracula 2001, Love Honour & Obey, Mansfield Park, Plunkett & Macleane, Afterglow, Regeneration, Trainspotting, Hackers
  • Kelly MacDonald: Special Correspondents, Swallows and Amazons (2016), Boardwalk Empire (TV), The Decoy Bride, Anna Karenina (2012), Brave (voice), Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows – part 2, Choke,  No Country For Old Men, Nanny McPhee, A Cock and Bull Story, Finding Neverland, Intermission, Gosford Park, Some Voices, House!, The Loss Of Sexual Innocence, Elizabeth I, Stella Does Tricks, Trainspotting
    Robert Carlyle:
    The Legend of Barney Thompson, 24 (TV), The Tournament, Summer, 28 Weeks Later, Flood, Eragon, The Mighty Celt, Black & White (2002), Once Upon a Time In The Midlands, The 51st State,  There’s Only One Jimmy Grimble, The Beach, Angela’s Ashes. James Bond – The World Is Not Enough, Ravenous, Plunkett & Macleane, Face, The Full Monty, Trainspotting, Go Now, Priest (1995), Riff-Raff, Silent Scream
  • Irvine Welsh: Trainspotting
  • Pauline Turner: Young Adam, Martin Chuzzlewit (TV)
  • Scot Greenan: Macbeth (2015)
  • Gordon Kennedy: Tank 432, The Borderlands, Robin Hood (TV), With Or Without You, Just Like a Woman
  • James Cosmo: The Ten Bells, Whiskey Galore (2016), London Heist, Tomorrow (2017), Monochrome, Eliminators, Ben Hur (2016), Dark Signal, Project 12 – The Bunker, Breakdown (2016), The Legend of Barney Thompson, Estranged, The Christmas Candle, We Still Kill The Old Way, Citadel, Hammer Of The Gods, Get Lucky, Game Of Thrones (TV), Outcast, Donkeys, Half Light, The Chronicles Of Narnia – The Lion The Witch & The Wardrobe, Troy, The Four Feathers (2002), Once Upon a Time In The Midlands, The Match, Babe 2 (voice), Emma (1996), Trainspotting, Braveheart, Stormy Monday, Highlander
  • Shirley Henderson: On The Road – Wolf Alice, Urban Hymn, Bridget Jones 3, Tale of Tales,  Set Fire To The Stars, In Secret, Filth, The Look Of Love, EverydayAnna Karenina (2012), Meek’s Cutoff, Life During Wartime, Wild Child, Miss Pettigrew Lives For a Day, Marie Antoinette, Harry Potter and The Goblet Of Fire, A Cock And Bull Story, Bridget Jones 2,  Yes, Intermission, Wilbur Wants To Kill Himself, Harry Potter and The Chamber Of Secrets, Once Upon a Time In The Midlands, 24 Hour Party People, Bridget Jones’ Diary, The Claim (2000), Wonderland (2000), Topsy Turvy, Trainspotting, Rob Roy

TRADERS

6.5 out of 10

Irish film production

Release date: 29th July 2016

Director: Racheal Moriarty & Peter Murphy

Cast: Killian Scott, John Bradley, Nika McGuigan, Peter O’Meara, Aoibhinn McGinnity, Olwen Fouere, David Murray, Caoilfhionn Dunne, David McSavage, Donal O’Farrell, Donal O’Healai, Tomas O’Sulleabhain with Tom Davis and Barry Keoghan

Writer: Racheal Moriarty & Peter Murphy

Trailer: TRADERS

WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?

 

TIGER RAID

5.5 out of 10

Irish film production

REVIEW COMING SOON

Release Date: 7th October 2016 (DVD Premiere)

Director: Simon Dixon

Cast: Brian Gleeson, Damien Molony, Sofia Boutella and Rory Fleck-Byrne

Writer: Simon Dixon, Mick Donnellan, Gareth Coulam Evans

Trailer: TIGER RAID

WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?

SURVIVORS (2015)

3.5 out of 10

Release Date: 26th October 2015 (DVD Premiere)

Director: Adam J Spinks (Extinction – Jurassic Predators)

Cast: Joanne Gale, David Anderson, Simon Burbage and Adrian Annis

Writer: Adam J Spinks & Lawrence Timms

Trailer: SURVIVORS (2015)

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A reasonable attempt at a no-budget zombie flick that is a cut above the rest because plot momentum is kept. Well-performed in the main by two of the three leads, its certainly an improvement on the majority of z-grade apocalypse movies. The camera man seems to be strong enough to hold the camera steady, the editor seems to know what he’s doing and there are some interesting supporting characters in the mix.

Joanne Gale’s Reporter stumbles on a government conspiracy to keep an ongoing outbreak of a virsu that turns everybody into mind less killers. She contacts her exboyfriend, Duke (SIMON BURBAGE – KNIGHTS OF THE DAMNED) to be her camera man. He annoys the hell out of her before they literally spilt up. Then in a later parallel story, Joanne is paired off with a mysterious man called Michael – the slightly wooden David Anderson (ADULT LIFE SKILLS) – who may have something to do with the virus. In parallel storylines both duos set off across England trying to survive.

Some scenes work better than others, depending on the supporting actor wheeled in to run the scene. Are they friend or foe? etc. The unknown Adrian Annis impresses the most as a muddled-up thug who’s gone past the point of return. The music and the locations are generally good as well for this kind of thing.

So whilst Survivors is far from brilliant, it’s at least watchable and once it ditches the annoying ‘found-footage’ framing after 15 minutes it begins to become more and more involving. You even begin to get used to Anderson’s weird non-acting style. Its the closest thing to a middle of the road zombie flick I’ve ever seen because it has no original ideas but it accomplishes more than the average low-grade zombie flick by concentrating on the characters and their predicaments and the gore and zombies are kept on the fringes, seen all too fleeting until it’s too late. Not a bad debut.

3.5 out of 10 – Above average, no budget flick made in the main by wanna-bes and amateurs.

WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?

TAKE DOWN

3 out of 10

REVIEW COMING SOON

Release date: 29th August 2016

Director: Jim Gillespie (I Know What You Did Last Summer)

Cast: Jeremy Sumpter, Phoebe Tonkin, Ed Westwick, Ashley Walters, Dominic Sherwood, Julia Ragnarsson, Max Deacon, Mark Bonnar, Simon Merrells, Elliott Knight, Liam McMahon, Thulissa Taixiera, Yuho Yamashita, Umar Malik, Hari Dhillon, Tracy Ifeachor, Sara Stewart with Robert Cavanah and Sebastian Koch

Writer: Alexander Ignon

Trailer: TAKE DOWN

WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?

  • Jeremy Sumpter: Into The Storm, Friday Night Lights (TV), Peter Pan (2003), Frailty
  • Phoebe Tonkin: The Vampire Diaries (TV), Bait (2012), Home and Away (TV), Tomorrow When The War Began
  • Ed Westwick: Bone In The Throat, Romeo & Juliet (2013), J Edgar, Chalet Girl, Son Of Rambow, Gossip Girl (TV)
  • Ashley Walters: Cuffs (TV), Montana, Top Boy (TV), All Stars, St. George’s Day, AnuvaHoodDemons Never DieSket, Speed Racer, Life and Lyrics, Get Rich Or Die Tryin’, Goal, Stormchaser– Alex Rider, Bullet Boy
  • Dominic Sherwood: Shadowhunters (TV), Vampire Academy, The Cut (TV)
  • Julia Ragnarsson: The Bridge (TV)
  • Max Deacon: Tommy’s Honour, The Call Up, Into The Storm, Summer In February, I Anna
  • Mark Bonnar: X Moor, Camera Trap, Shetland (TV), Line of Duty (TV), Psychoville (TV), The Bill (TV), Casualty (TV), Holby City (TV)
  • Simon Merrells: Victrix, Judas Ghost, Spartacus (TV), Family Affairs (TV), Mersey Beat (TV), London’s Burning (TV)
  • Elliott Knight: American Gothic (TV), Sinbad (TV)
  • Liam McMahon: Titanic (TV), Hunger
  • Yuho Yamashita: The Forest
  • Hari Dhillon: Holby City (TV)
  • Sara Stewart: The Face of an Angel, Sugar Rush (TV), Rebus (TV) Drop The Dead Donkey (TV)
  • Robert Cavanah: The London Firm, Assassin (2015), Fall of the Essex BoysPimp, The Royal (TV), Doctors (TV), Eastenders (TV)
  • Sebastian Koch: Homeland (TV),  The Danish Girl, Bridge of Spies, Die Hard 5, Albatross, Unknown (2011), Black Book, The Lives Of Others, Flirt

TANK 432 – BELLY OF THE BULLDOG

3 out of 10

Release date: 22nd August 2016 (DVD Premiere)

Director: Jim Gillespie

Cast: Rupert Evans, Deirdre Mullins, Michael Smiley, April Pearson, Steve Garry, Alex March with Tom Meeten and Gordon Kennedy

Writer: Jim Gillespie

Trailer: TANK 432

belly_of_the_bulldogThere are some ideas at play here in Tank 432, except I don’t know what they were, so incomprehensible is its story.  The plot is so convoluted and wilfully confusing it’s doesn’t make for a good 90 minutes of film viewing. And that’s disappointing because all the ingredients are present for an intriguing ‘men on a mission movie’.

Like R-Point and Deathwatch before it, this chooses cryptic over creepy. As a horror, Tank 432 lacks chills, thrills or atmosphere. So therefore its an exercise in flatness. Several soldiers are on a hostage taking mission, they come under fire and take shelter in a Bulldog tank. The leader Sgt. Smith (GORDON KENNEDY – THE BORDERLANDS) knows more than he’s letting on, and as the body count rises the soldiers slowly discover that’s what’s happening to them is no accident. What role will the tank play in their future, can they escape the belly of the bulldog once they become locked in, who are the spectres in insect masks, and what’s the orange powder they encounter going to do to their minds? The above average cast is squandered and they struggle to make sense of the repetitive and clunky script. Kennedy suffers the most with the worst dialogue, and the usually dependable Michael Smiley (KILL LIST) over plays his lunatic. Elsewhere, Rupert Evans (THE MAN IN THE HIGH TOWER) and Deirdre Mullins (MAN DOWN) take the nominal leads. They both do well, expect for a horror there’s but one memorable death. All the other death’s are unforgettable and pretty unshowy.

Boasting Ben Wheatley as producer, and some good cult actors, Tank 432 stalls and refuses to evolve into anything interesting. Even the final reveal is botched, making the ‘twist’ in the tale a nonsensical cherry on the cake. Director Nick Gillespie is Wheatley’s regular cinematographer but it looks like this leg up was a generous move as the director and writer has a long way go to be anywhere near good as him.

 3 out of 10 – Flat action horror that goes nowhere and squanders interesting ideas and good actors. Ultimately, it’s boring and confusing. Stank 432.

Another review below!

WHAT HAVE I SEEN THAT ACTOR IN BEFORE?